Egyptian reflections, part 2

So, my last couple of posts were kind of downers, eh? I spent a fair amount of time struggling in Egypt, but I have been spending a fair amount of time struggling with myself recently and Egypt is hardly to blame.

It is so incredible that I was able to spend two weeks in northern Africa this winter. The trip abroad was exactly what I needed to revitalize my outlook on life. It reminded me of how important it is to keep meeting new people, exploring new places, and letting myself grow. I was a bit disappointed that we spent so much of our time with the class, doing the tourism thing, and not discovering the Egypt that Egyptians experience. At the same time, we had a fantastic group. Despite horrid traffic and many uncomfortable hours spent traveling, illness and serious indigestion, unpredictable schedules and lost luggage, everyone was a joy to be around.

I am always amazed by how alive and awake I feel when traveling, despite the jetlag and unfamiliar schedules. It is incredible how meaningful the most everyday and normally tedious things become. I realized that because I have been feeling somewhat down, struggling for reasons that are perhaps understandable, I have been looking for justification for that feeling. Instead of finding ways to feel better about myself and the world. Which is not wise, I am aware. They're always there, though, aren't they? Reasons to be unhappy with myself or the world, the people around me or where I am. I often fool myself into believing that it is a sign of intelligence to see only bad in the world. We absolutely must recognize problems around us, yes, or nothing can every be done about them. But working to build an ever longer list of things that make me unhappy about the world isn't intelligence, just masochism.

I have to remember that recognizing injustice is worth something, and being willing to speak out about it something more. But my sights should be set on living an offered solution to the world's problems, even if sometimes all I can offer is a small joy in the face of hopelessness.