So I've had kind of a strange couple of weeks. I was rather low for awhile and this was compunded by my feeling foolish for feeling low and it took me a while to, first, give myself permission to not be happy and, second, to investigate why I wasn't happy.
This is a phase that I go through regularly; I want to say once or twice a year. I have to re-realize that being unhappy does not make me a failure, but it is probably telling me something important about myself. It trips me up and makes me realize I've been crawling. I have been thinking about this article (Depression's Evolutionary Roots, in Scientific American), which discusses depression as an evolutionary necessity, as the mental analogy to a physical fever-- an automatic response that helps to eradicate another problem.
Other than dealing with my emotions, as always, I've started seriously looking into education as a career. I'm looking into Iowa state certification, Chinese language teacher training, and Waldorf and Montessori certification. My ego will be a bit upset with me if I don't decide to pursue higher education in Science and become part of my generation's Badass Female Scientist League, but I think I might be happier as an educator. I see many of our problems today rooted in the fact that students don't learn to investigate truth on their own in school; they learn to mimic those 'smarter' (probably really only more educated) than themselves, so that after school all important issues easily become a competition between sides who have already decided what they think. (There will be more on education later, I hope, as I have yet to understand to my satisfaction the difference between the Waldorf and Montessori philosophies.)
Basically, after a couple of weeks of mental bewilderment, I have come to the conclusion that what I need to decide what direction to move in my life is a systematic exploration of topics I am interested in... like, maybe, a weekly blog series! I am too clever for myself, sometimes.
Title is from Jack Johnson's "Dreams be Dreams."
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YOUR PERFECT DEGREE? COGNITIVE DEVELOPMENT. SOOOOOOOOO COOL. its the one place that really answers the questions for me- like depression, the role of emotions and rational thought, the importance and effect of nature or nurture, the purpose and possibilities of schools, learning and education. SEEDS at the U of M is a program i am looking into right now. If you find cool programs- send them my way! i am looking too! hope your well Kara.
ReplyDeleteHello, dearest friend Kara!
ReplyDeleteI very much appreciated this heartfelt post! I love your honesty! You are such a lovely human being!
I had many thoughts in response... I agree about the cycles of the mind. All the rest of life goes in cycles; it only makes sense that there be seasons of the mind that balance us out somehow!
Perhaps you would enjoy to investigate programs in Instructional Design and Technology, too. Indiana has a fantastic program in particular. Tsvet and I both studied and worked in this field; it's like applied cognitive psychology. It's like being educational support people, with a good dose of information technology mixed in. I think we tend to have less face-to-face contact with our students than other educators, however, so whether it's for you just depends on your interests! (duh!)
I wonder if you would enjoy one of my recent blog posts, in which I consider a Baha'i-inspired definition of souls as eternal learning entities... Here's a link: http://wp.me/p15kko-6K. I would love to know what you think! I'm thinking about these things in the context of justice. The topic is certainly keeping me busy! I guess I don't pick things because they are easy. :)
I wish you godspeed on your journey! Assuredly, your path leads you to wonder and joy, whatever season you find yourself in just at this moment!
Love,
Sarah
hm. did this thing post? :P
Hello Kara,
ReplyDeleteHow I love reading your thoughts and musings! While I'd love to see you pursue science, I'm so glad to see you figuring out what truly is important to you. I could see you as a fantastic educator and am looking forward to learning the respective benefits of the Waldorf and Montessori philosophies, since I haven't a clue! Love you and looking forward to hearing more!
-Nikki Pantzlaff :o)
Education sounds good for you, but so might other things! I know you will be awesome at whatever you choose, though. :)
ReplyDeleteWe should skype soon.. I just need to catch you online.. :)